Friday, June 29, 2012

Hurricane in a Bottle

I'm like a hurricane in a bottle... sometimes I'm a "the glass is half-full" kind of girl, sometimes I'm "half-empty", but regardless, I'm always spinning around in confusion.

Tuesday, June 26, 2012

Friendship No Stronger than a Cactus

Three fun loving girls,
symbolized by a cactus
who always stood tall.
But once three returned to two,
Mickey fell over. The end.
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My poor Mickey ):

Sunday, June 24, 2012

Inspiration is Everywhere

Within life, words hide
in every nook and cranny,
waiting to be found.
It is through a poet's eye,
that they are caught and penned down.

(Inspired by the poem ... I Write Here ...)

Yours

Would you take my hand
and kiss each of my fingers?
Would you take my ring,
and point the crown to your heart?
All I want to be is yours.

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Wasted Time

I'm just sitting here,
here upon the cold hard floor
letting time slip by.
I've accomplished nothing here.
I'll never get this time back.

Wednesday, June 20, 2012

Loneliness

It's that feeling when
you wake up and realize that
you have no power.
You can try to reconnect,
but you can't make them accept.

You can always try
to fix what you did not break.
You can always try
your blind trust on someone new,
but they have to want it too.

It's that feeling when
you lay in bed and realize...
There is no power
to be held over others.
It starts and ends with yourself.



Monday, June 18, 2012

Taking a Chance Though Older Eyes

Living young and free,
unafraid to take a chance,
She'll try anything.
But a different set of eyes
warns her to be more cautious...

"Life can be a bitch,
it's not always what it seems;
So just use your brains.
Yes, you can follow your heart,
but make sure you trust your gut."

Sunday, June 17, 2012

The Last of Days (Graduation)

Hello all, here I am, officially Graduated for the past two days! (: *pause for applause* haha well I told you I'd write some about what happened at graduation, and I try to not disappoint. ( Some people may have other words on that... ) But here it is:

After a week's worth of practices running from 8 AM until between 10:30 and 11 ( yes, AM! ) the big day came upon me and left faster than a starving mosquito. ( Don't question my analogies ^.^ )

I didn't have a lot of tears, with exception to first getting to the school waiting for everyone to arrive. The day had been crazy with trying to figure out how to fit in visits with BOTH sides of the family... It was getting to be too much when mixed in with thinking about all the friendships that fell apart and the people I'd never talk to again. But after sitting down and listing to the directions that we were being reminded of, I was good for the majority of the rest of the night.

I say majority because in the program we had a special piece for Tom. A thank you to the community from Mrs. Lynch was read, along with a poem and bio about him written by Andrew (his best friend, who was like a brother to him ). Andrew then released balloons which were gorgeous against the blue sky.

The next time tears almost came was when the diplomas started to get handed out. There are several sets of twins in my grade, and the Ehret brothers are two amazing guys who are just... amazing! Chris and Corey... they have such a special bond that's been tried and true with everything that's happened. The short story is this: Corey has been diagnosed and batting Rhabdomyosarcoma, a rare form of childhood cancer, for 5 or 6 years now. ( If you do the math, you're right.... he was 12 or 13 when he found out. ) But he's been strong in keeping up with his work and attitude when it comes to not being able to be in school and treatment and everything else that comes with it. He wasn't able to go through all the rehearsals, but we were told that with the help of his brother, he was going to walk. It had gotten to be time for Chris to go up but the girls I was sitting next to and I didn't know where Corey was... we were honestly starting to get really worried until we heard clapping and saw the rows in front of us turn around. In a go-cart kind of thing rode Corey and his family walked beside it. Everyone stood and clapped as he got closer and as Chris came down from the ramp to meet his brother, and it was together that the two of them slowly made their way to the stage. Words cannot describe the beauty in a moment like that, but it truly is something that touches the heart.

When it was my turn to go up, I walked and got complimented on wearing my Scout pin. The rest of the ceremony was a blur, but here are some pictures to top off this post!(:


The stage and chairs looking quite empty.

My partner and I walking in to Graduation.
( I'd say we have swag :P )

Four white balloons and a silver star released for Tom.
P.S. I hope you caught them <3

The president and superintendent of the district...
My thoughts? "Don't fall! SMILE! Say thank you! Don't forget to flip the tassel!"

We throw our caps up in the air sometimes....

My Uncle Jay, Sister Katelyn, and Aunt Nancy.
I think they brought some Florida sun with them. (:

My Aunt Nancy, myself, and Uncle Jay.

My Father and I.

My Mother, myself, and my Father.
(Yes... this was a rare happening!!)
...
[rarer than seeing Bigfoot!]

My Grandparents (Father's side) and I.

Katelyn and I...
And my Father photobombing... :P

My totally awesome Sociology and Psychology (and every day Life Lessons) teacher Mr. Tom Gilroy and I.

Miss Emily and Katelyn.
Best Friends <3 <3

Jeff Kelly, myself, and Shaun Mitchell.
The cool tech guys of the Theatre department.

I came out of nowhere with a hug to my bestest friend, Andrew. <3 <3

And why they didn't center the "Dallas" with the "High School", the world will never know...
(But don't I look cute under it?)

The world's best Librarian, Ms. Augustine, and I.

The official certificate that's about the size of half a slice of computer paper.

The Cabanas for the all night Lock-in, which happened from 10:30pm until  6 in the freaking morning!

Tables for Lock-in which I rarely sat in.

Saturday, June 16, 2012

Salt in the Wound

Invite me aboard,
and watch as our friendship grows.
Now let some time pass,
and just cut me open wide,
as you throw me to the sea.

Friday, June 15, 2012

Tom's Tree

I sit out of place,
like a fish out of water,
near this great big stage.
Soon I'll be placed in the ground
to keep his memory strong.
Tom's Tree, near the ramp we used to walk off the stage, as graduates.

Thursday, June 14, 2012

Adieu (The Last Goodbye)

Alright... I've finally found myself sitting at the computer in time to start to type a story, instead of yet another poem.

If you didn't know, I'm a senior at Dallas High School. After tomorrow, I will never be able to say that (truthfully) again. Instead, I'll be saying,

"Hi! I'm Stephanie, and I'm a GRADUATE of Dallas High School."

It's mind blowing really.

Anyways, the past few weeks have just been absolutely crazy. I can't keep up with writing it all down, so I apologize, but I guess there are just some stories that are classified under "you had to be there". But I do have some things to share.

To my new followers, and to those who have just stumbled upon my little abode here, the story I have to share is a continuation of one that's been going on since February 13th, 2012. This really isn't a ploy into getting you to read more of my ramblings, but if I were to sum up this tale I think it just wouldn't be the same. So here are the links to read about another one of my dearest classmates...

February 13th, 2012 What Do I Title a Story Like This?
February 14th, 2012 Nothing More To Say, but So Much Left Unsaid
February 15th, 2012 Just...
March 14th, 2012     A Sad, Sad Follow-up

I'm hoping that by now you've gained a sense of how chaotic that week was, how emotions were running all over the place and how things had just fallen apart. But now a new challenge has surfaced, as we all knew it was coming. Graduation is tomorrow, and it's just one more thing to get through. As of today I know generally what it will be like, and what is going to be said about Tom, but I'll wait to share that until tomorrow when I can really let you in to what it was like. I'll also have a poem to share, that I've already written but I want to have a picture to post with it so that you can get a better idea of how everything went. I'm really hoping that in the midst of everything I'll get the opportunity to get a good shot.... "In the midst of everything"... *sigh* I'm going to see and hug and say goodbye to so many people tomorrow... It's hard to believe that I won't be seeing a lot of anyone else really after this... But man, we've got memories to last us a life time, and we know that if there's anything going on, we can count on each other.

The amazing thing about the people I go to school with is that we have the ability to pull together when we're having a rough time. Despite many people's less than stellar dispositions, we forget about ourselves and focus on one another. Sure, some guys will still be complete ass holes and some of the girls will still act bitchy but for that brief moment in time when life gets in their face, none of it matters. The Dallas High School Class of 2012 is really just one big family.

As a class, my grade has gone through so much. Between loosing Tom, and having another classmate, Corey, who, for over 5 years now, has been battling a rare childhood cancer that has changed him so much physically but empowered him mentally,  we've seen and dealt with more than most teenagers go through. There's Bethany, the sweetest girl you will ever meet who's wheelchair bound, but her dreams, mind, and ambitions are so strong. There's also Marilyn, who is another example of someone who doesn't let life bring her down (Read here for her inspiring story). I know I could list so many more people here who have faced life with such a "bring it on" kind of attitude, and I wish I had time to. But as our time is dwindling to a close, I must bid thee adieu, because this really almost is the last goodbye.

Mute

Everything's been said,
so please, don't repeat yourself.
The past is the past.
There's no point in breaking an
already broken record.

No Such Thing As A Perfect Wish

In this crazy life,
be careful what you wish for.
In time you'll get it.
What once was won't come again,
you'll get your wish, and then some.

Monday, June 11, 2012

Behind Every Phone Tree Is...

A community,
so tight knit and close in heart .
Always together,
looking after each other,
and ready to lend a hand.

Sunday, June 10, 2012

Colour the Darkness

The bright sunlight shines
through the gaps of the rain clouds.
Lighting this dark day.
As water falls from the sky,
a multicoloured arc shows.

Saturday, June 09, 2012

Run

To me, they all run.
For a shoulder to cry on,
an ear to listen,
for proof that they're not alone.
But, oh! To whom can I run?

Friday, June 08, 2012

The Party Bus ♥

In bus number two,
'twas a party from the start.
All the girls and guys,
singing, dancing, playing snaps...
It's too bad this is the end.

A Dog's Day

On a busy street,
I sit and watch all the cars.
Sometimes they see me.
But no one has stopped to ask,
"Oh Honey, where's your owner?"

Thursday, June 07, 2012

A Creative Update

So with being out of school extremely early due to now practicing for Graduation and Baccalaureate, I had this out of the blue inspiration to start a collection of silly Tankas for kids (and when I say kids I really mean for kids of all ages). As of an hour or so ago, I have a few already written, but I'll share them eventually... I've posted quite a few Haikus lately, so that should be enough to keep you all busy for the next day or so ^.^ In case you don't know, the Tanka is similar to the Haiku. While the Haiku has a syllable pattern of 5, 7, 5, the Tanka makes it a little bit longer by going 5, 7, 5, 7, 7. I kind of like it better because it allows me to tell more of a story. Anyways, just thought I'd give you that creative update since I've been checked out for awhile. I know I owe you all a Diary of Me entry and I'll try to type something up tonight to post tomorrow because there's really so much that's happened and life's just going to continue to run away from (with?) me as the days pass. Hope you all are well and I'll catch up with you soon(:

Graduation

Can this be real life?
Time's flown by, without a doubt.
And so here I am.

A Green Heart

Who says love can't grow?
With a little TLC,
it is possible.

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Circus of the Squirrles

Man made a tight rope,
but God made them bushy tails
for this natural act.

Agree to Disagree

Can we just say yes,
to finally end the games?
Pretty, pretty please?

Summer Leisure

Swaying back and forth,
the lines criss-cross on my back
as I watch the clouds.

Vacuum, Oh, Vacuum

I make the floor clean,
sucking in dirt, crumbs and fur
I hold it all close.

#hardcore

'Cause I'm a cool cat,
I eat Froyo with a spoon...
A Blue's Clues, kid's spoon.

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Texting the Ex

Desperation is
just a showing of weakness.
Don't you dare backslide!

I'm No Puppet

I just can't do it.
I have to cut off these strings.
I can stand without.

Wednesday, June 06, 2012

A Doomed Relationship, You Say?

Let them have their time.
It's better to be happy
now, than not at all.

Can't Keep Up

My body is here,
but my mind is far away.
Oh, reality.

I can't keep up with you.
Time is moving way to fast...
I need a freeze ray.

Crush

The last on my mind,
is first in the morning.
He's in my thoughts.

Morning

The Sun rises up
It's rays kiss my tired eyes
It's a brand new day.

Battle for Food

Hunger eats my soul.
Head and stomach collide.
Do I eat or not?

Perception

This world is so cold.
The pain lodged inside our heads
Keeps all the warmth out.

Don't Be Sorry

I'm sick of hearing
the empty apologies.
They don't mean a thing.

For Ms. Bulgaris

AP English is...
Fun! Insane! Awesome! Special...
We all will miss you!

Nature's Lover

Oh! What is it like,
To always be in his life?
I wish I was thee.

Tuesday, June 05, 2012

Copy Cat

Imitation is
the best form of flattery.
That's not always true.

Monday, June 04, 2012

PLEASE, PLEASE READ!

I know we all have our days... You know the ones where we just can't get out of bed or the ones where everything is just going the wrong way. When it seems like the world is against you and that no one is there to help you through a tough time, try counting your blessings. If that doesn't work, read this story about an amazing friend of mine and then count again. Life is hard, but with a positive attitude you can achieve anything. There really isn't anything more I can say, let the story speak for itself. Despite Heartbreaking Obstacles...

Then, please send it on using this link -> http://itsanorganizedmess.blogspot.com/2012/06/please-please-read.html

A Small Reminder

Take your finger and
to remember, tie a knot....
Why? I've forgotten!

Sunday, June 03, 2012

8:00 AM

The birds are singing.
The sun has come up. But i'm...
going back to bed.

Haiku

Sometimes there are days
where my mind is set to think
in terms of haiku.

Saturday, June 02, 2012

Playing Cards on a Train inside a Box Full of Love

Relationships... they come and go. People are either physically in your life or only their presence is. Once you've met someone... the only way to get rid of him or her is to just forget, but we all know how easy that can be. (Yes, that was sarcastic.) There are times when thoughts of that special someone is tossed to the wayside by more important things, but when the slightest gap between the train that is thought appears, the heart shoves their face back to the forefront of your mind. For me, it can be gut wrenching. The abyss that swallowed up the warmth in my chest makes itself known, and from it's grasp escapes what's left... The "shoulda-coulda-woulda's" and the "what-if's"... the memories rise up and take back what common sense had settled down in my brain and ever so persuasively convinces it to pack up and leave town, rendering my heart defenseless (which, unbeknownst to my heart, is not a good thing!). About an hour ago I finished watching The Lake House with my darling mother for the first time. It's been awhile since I had last seen a romance and honest to God, sometimes the genre kills me. Love is something I have lost all control with, but then again, when did I ever have control? Regardless if I knew what I was doing, I, at the very least, knew when something special was going on to try to do something about it. When I was younger it never worked out, probably because everything I saw was filtered through the eyes of a day dreamer and interperted by a boy crazy girl. The only difference now, is that I know what cards I hold in my hands, and with that comes power. With power comes a price, that being you need someone to play the game with. Otherwise, I'm just another lonely girl sitting at a table by herself, rightfully playing solitaire. So as I sit here, reading what I type out loud and deciding where to place my over-zealous affair with the commas and ellipses, I yearn for some kind of relationship. I don't want it to be one that will last forever unless it's meant to, and if it is I don't want to know. Today is a gift, and as all the wise people say that's why it's called the present, and so it is in each gift wrapped day that I want to live, slowly removing the bow, and then lifting the wrap off by gently peeling away the tape. I want to have fun in doing so... I want tomorrow to still be a mystery and to be able to look at it with endless wonder as to what it contains in the same way that I want to be able to look at someone and have that moment where I know deep down inside it was meant to be. I can't have a guy putting his feeling out on the line, saying that they foresee us being together forever without me feeling the same way... that's happened before and the end result is I push him away. I don't want that anymore...I don't want to be so strong and independent that I can't let anyone in. I miss being able to have the late night conversations where I fall asleep waiting for his reply, I miss sitting in class just thinking about what the future may or may not hold... I want to be able to write a letter and know that there's a guy who's waiting for it as much as I wait for his reply... I want to be able to wish that one day things will work out in such a way that will result in endless bliss. As of right now... it's all in the cards. There are so many presents waiting to be unwrapped. Soon, the train will be pulling into the station and who knows who or what will get on. It's honestly all a mystery. The only thing I am positive as of right now, is that something has changed within me, that something is not the same. Not to quote Wicked, but there's something inside me that has grown. It's a tiny essence of hope, tying itself with strength to my heart. It's a reminder that something good can always happen, and to never give up. It's there right now, and I'm pretty sure it'll be there in the morning. So wherever you will be in a few years, my dear, I know I'll be there with you when the time is right. Until then, sweet dreams.

That's A Lot of Posts...

Two hundred and one
blurbs full of great passion...
Oh what is to come?

Gotta Have Skill

Wishing on a star
can only take you so far
on the road to par.

Chance?

Lets be honest here,
it happened for a reason.
Nothing's a mistake.

Castles in the Sky, Stars on Earth

The buildings stand tall,
tall enough to touch the sky.
They block out the night.

The stars and the moon
are hidden by clouds above,
their glow goes unseen.

But a magic touch
reveals the city's own stars,
lighting up the street.

"Castles in the Sky"
2012 Patrick Gensel
www.adventuretravelbuzz.com





Naptime

Wake the sleeping beast,
under penalty of death...
Silence is golden.

Your Smile

I had forgotten
what having feelings was like...
You've warmed my cold heart.

Photograph

Catch a glimpse of time
standing absolutely still
and relive the past.

It's Not Your Problem

Having to play God,
trouble was bound to follow.
Just stay out of it!

Just a Fake

Hellbent on acting
You don't know what's up or down.
Who are you really?

An Everyday Form of Happiness

I wish you could see
everything you do to me.
Our friendship? The key.

Friday, June 01, 2012

Not One, but Two

I shouldn't be sad
with how things ended for us...
The end was coming.

And so there it was,
the end came before the start;
now it's like before.

You still catch my eye
but I know I don't catch yours;
it's better that way.

Not a word is said...
though I'm sure there's so much left
trapped behind our walls.

One chance is enough.
Two is beyond any price,
found only in dreams.

Could there be a third?
It's unimaginable.
But you never know.

Nature's Balance

I stand in the middle of the woods,
the focal point holding Nature's balance within my sight.
To my left the water rushes and gushes.
To my right it flows smooth and steady.
A juxtapositional metaphor,
just waiting for someone with the poetic touch.
Life's so complicated.
It's so...
Stop and go.
If we're not chopping ourselves into fine bits,
scattering ourselves thin,
Then we're doing absolutely nothing.
But that's to the extreme.
If you bring your gaze from the far side of each bank,
and closer to the path in between,
you'll find a moment to steady yourself.
Discover the combination of being busy and having down time.
In one glance,
watch the water take chances,
jumping over rocks,
turning life upside down;
while it also relaxes,
taking things slow and steady,
taking time to enjoy the ride.
That's the way to live one's life.
Stand in the middle of the woods,
with the flow of water to your right and left.
Watch how each one moves differently,
and just take a moment to learn from Nature's balance.

Nature's Song

Wind through the trees,
rustles the leaves
to the drum beat of hikers' feet
and the chorus of the babbling, bubbling brook.

The Car Crash

I had hoped us dead,
to find peace across life's bank
as we hit the ground.

But She Cannot Walk Away

The Wicked sees it
fall on her precious sister,
the shelter with limbs.

My Hero

Daddy, my hero
sets fire to the wrong man.
Daddy, my hero?

I Know It's Not Love

Someone tell me please
what's a relationship like?
I don't have a clue.